I promise myself today that I'm gonna start taking my assignments more seriously. I realised I've been in la la land without thinking much about what I'm doing, always rushing for my assignments at the last minute and basically doing half-hearted work. Not to mention the fact that I barely study for my theory exams.

I've got to talk to people who are not competitive to get ideas, to share our knowledge with each other and to combine them. So many times we are so caught up trying to best each other that we forget two heads are better than one. That no film can be completed without a crew for the best work is with the help of others. An edge of competitiveness is good but don't be selfish I suppose, and learn from others like how you should let others teach you.

And that's why I love my current class.

Other than that, I wish sometimes how I imagine the ideas in my mind can come out on paper nicely, but it never happens and it disappoints me. And I still feel it, the passion burning for making films, I just hope entering film school won't extinguish it before I even start in the working world.

I'm so scared sometimes in my heart that I'm not good enough that I feel like running away.

Thank god I have great friends though, supporting me in whatever crisis I have in so many ways.

Labels: Remember